How do I deal with over thinking and rehashing a relationship that has long ended and that has turned upside down my personal and familial life?

by | Mar 25, 2017 | Question & Answer

Question Details:

I am a girl. I was in a relationship with a guy for 7 years. After that, he left me and married someone else.  At first, I thought I’ll easily overcome this situation. It’s almost two and a half years and I am not able to get over him. My friends left me. My parents don’t trust me. My academics hampered a lot. I am an engineer by profession. I feel my life has drastically turned upside down after this incident. My parents want me to get married and I am not ready for that. My life has become hell and most of the time I feel lost somewhere. I keep on thinking what went wrong with my life. No charm , nothing left..

Accept that there is more to you than you have thought there were, and start exploring what you have been discovering with acceptance and unconditional love.

Sometimes our upbringing and social conditioning makes us believe that we are or should be in control of everything in our lives. Inner mastery and outer harmony with life is a result of genuine growth of the person through the life experiences given to them, but we may not be at that level yet.

We are all discovering the unconditional love within, we are all discovering ourselves as creative beings, we are all discovering our oneness with life, and who we really are. The expectations society places upon us can be huge burdens within us, if a part of us is believing our self worth is determined by these judgments of whether or not we are deserving of love.

It can seem that the cause of what you are going through is one event, but that event really is a trigger for you that has unleashed (or brought to your awareness) a deep reservoir of unexplored emotions/thoughts, unaccepted parts of yourself, blocks within you that were already blocking the flow of unconditional love inside you, but were temporarily hidden by the relationship you were in.

The process of healing you need to undergo will take as much as it will take. There is no shortcut for this. In time, you will learn to fill every nook and cranny with the love within you. Even when you have just begun on this path of unconditional love, the charm will begin to return to your life, and a lot of emotional pain as well that you have been suppressing and that was waiting for you to heal. Know that it is very natural to suffer, but it is not a permanent destiny to suffer. We suffer as long as the causes of this suffering are not removed from our minds. So, know that your suffering is related to your own mind, even if it seems related to your relationship, and indeed it is, because in your mind it is so. As one gains the insights and goes through the healing process, their suffering is gradually removed as well, but not completely until they are fully awakened, and there can be extremely dark times as well.

Everybody is bound to eventually explore the darkest corners within themselves and the brightest light. So, you can be OK with whatever you are experiencing. It is human.

Research about emotional healing, spiritual growth, meditation, topics related to your emotional distress. Find truly healthy (emotionally) and wise people who are capable of providing support and guidance to you when you need it. This can quicken your healing process based upon what I am seeing as your current level, because one needs to learn to value their own experience and find their inner guidance to a sufficient level to be able to fully rely on their personal intuition (in-tuition) to live, heal and grow further. Yet, the more you focus on finding this within you, the quicker you will get there. (because it is there)

The following links contain a lot of really useful videos and other material that you can benefit from according to your preference to resolve your problems (you can also learn to use the search function in that link to focus on subjects that you desire):

1.Emotional Healing: Higher Consciousness Spiritual Teachings & Guided Meditations ” Channel Higher Self

2.Spiritual Growth: Higher Consciousness Spiritual Teachings & Guided Meditations ” Channel Higher Self

3.Meditation:Higher Consciousness Spiritual Teachings & Guided Meditations ” Channel Higher Self

4.Step by Step Everything:New to Higher Self Teachings? Start here.

A note about the writings in this site: I recommend you check these two articles (article 1) (article 2) about the writings on this site if you haven’t already.