On the Importance of Unconditional Love in Helping People and Building Relationships

by | Nov 21, 2015 | Article (Translated From Turkish)

* Visit this link to read the original Turkish version of this post before translation.

When we focus on Unconditional Love, or Divine Love, and remain in a state of awareness, we enter a deep process of purification, healing, maturation. This is an important aspect of spiritual development on a personal level. It is important because it is necessary to go through this process in order to transcend our own personality, our ego/self, to transcend our limitations, and to become a more expanded, more inclusive, peaceful, happy being.

On a personal level, when we focus on Divine Love and remain in a state of awareness, the Higher Consciousness literally washes us with this Divine Love, cleanses us, and fills us with a pure energy. Washing and cleansing are the words I use, not in the sense of cleansing from impurities, but in the sense of releasing the energies that we have created within us that no longer serve us and letting them flow out of us. Perhaps the most reasonable thing to do in the environment you were in when you were a child was to suppress your childhood, your ability to live in the moment, and to submit a little bit to adults imposing on you with conditional love the patterns that they felt were right for that moment. That little bit can be more or less depending on the level of repression or the amount of unconditional love. You may have had a less traumatic childhood or a very traumatic childhood. If your parents are very advanced, you may not have had any trauma at all, but I think that is very, very rare.

The concept of trauma should not be overestimated. Slamming your finger on the table is also a trauma. Just as physical trauma is natural, so are emotional and mental traumas. In the same way when we grow up, there are emotional and mental tables everywhere and we keep bumping our fingers on them. Until we learn not to. If we had come into a world where everything was light and love and our soul was inexperienced, we wouldn’t have made much progress. When we experience these limitations and come out of them with maturity, at the same time our mastery of creativity is greatly enhanced.

Yes, on a personal level, focusing on Divine Love and maintaining a state of awareness offers deep purification and maturation in the fastest way possible, as far as I know. Because you have begun to receive direct guidance from the Higher Consciousness, the omniscient consciousness that encompasses the universe that God created. Your Higher Consciousness, my Higher Consciousness, it’s actually the same thing. You are receiving guidance directly from God, from the highest level of wisdom. By way of comparison, for example, if you get guidance from your teacher in the classroom and he is not conscious of complete surrender to God, it means you are learning from his personal and limited point of view.

This purification in the personal dimension also applies in the dimension of relationships. When we relate to other people, focusing on Unconditional Love and being in a state of awareness, in a kind of inner stillness, can enable us to give them the greatest benefits we can. Because actually we are all creating our own reality from the Spiritual dimension and if the other person is suffering or stuck, the best solution is for that person to purify themselves with Love and Awareness, to let Love purify them, to surrender to God. Maybe that person will never use the word God, the word Love in his life, but that is not important. I am just pointing to a phenomenon that is happening with some words in my vocabulary. For some it may be words like enlightenment, consciousness, integration with existence, attunement, harmony with life, finding peace, personal development etc… The experience I am talking about is essentially the same, the words used may be different.

Since we are creating our own reality, only we can save ourselves from tormenting ourselves. This free will is given to us, or rather it is inherent in us. Since the other person is subject to the same mechanics, your approach of focusing on Divine Love, focusing on Unconditional Love, will cause them to feel this energy in some way. Whether he is aware of it or not, your energy will affect him and you will be supporting him. Of course, as this energy is happening around him or her, he or she may move away from you or withdraw, he or she may resist this energy. But no matter what, like a snowball in contact with the sun, this energy will begin to melt it, if that person continues to hold you more or less in their reality. There will be an effect, and it will be quite effective, as long as the association continues.

This and the next will be shaped for that person, according to that person’s preferences, just like your meditation, your experience of Divine Love depends on your focus, your surrender. In fact, there is no need to even think of the after as the before, life is one single moment of continuity, and creation goes on in a continuum. Whatever you are really focusing on creating right now will shape your life in that direction. In this context the past doesn’t matter, you can change everything now.

How? If you are now living in a world with a chronological history, you cannot change the events that have happened in the past, because you want to live in such a world, you are not giving up. But you can choose the meanings you attach to these events, what you make of the past, or you can choose to create a new reality by engaging in a process of creation with intentions that are completely independent of it. You know, there are people in life who suddenly take a turn. They start to change in an instant, for example, there are those who quit smoking in an instant, those who change careers in an instant, those who dedicate themselves to spiritual development in an instant. Everything happens in an instant, everything happens in an instant, it starts in an instant and continues in an instant.

If you don’t maintain your focus on Unconditional Love and your state of awareness, and you start to focus mainly on the surface, your deep purification will pause, and it will start to stay on the surface, that is, you will be focused on the experiences that are here, and there will be no change in the deep energies that remain inside and affect you. In a way your deep purification will pause. And this is the most important factor in today’s world where people cannot understand each other and cannot find peace:

As humanity, we have not yet learned to approach each other with Unconditional Love. Since we have not yet found Unconditional Love or have realized it to a limited extent, as we continue our life and our search, we may judge each other, trigger each other and create life dramas in our relationships with each other, often in accordance with our ego/self. When we turn on the news and look at human relationships, we see countless examples of this. People who cannot understand each other, who judge each other. In some cases, people who don’t even want to understand, and in some cases, people who try and strive to understand but don’t quite succeed.

In a way, focusing on Unconditional Love and maintaining Awareness helps us to learn the same action. So focusing on the truth is in a way giving us the mastery itself, and focusing on the truth will teach us what the truth is. So it itself teaches itself.

And for humanity, this is what will bring mutual understanding and cessation of conflict. In order to understand each other, we have to allow Unconditional Love to mature us so that we can learn the lessons and our minds can break out of the patterns that no longer serve us and reach out to wider realities. In this way, our understanding will grow and we will be able to truly understand each other. And when we begin to understand each other, conflicts will begin to disappear. Therefore, focusing on Unconditional Love and living in a state of awareness, that is, learning to live in harmony with existence, in a state of surrender, is of great importance and indispensable for the peace, happiness and development of humanity. Therefore, focusing on Unconditional Love is also very, very important in relationships. In fact, in my opinion and feeling, there is nothing more important in terms of getting rid of troubles and sorrows and increasing our happiness.

Add-on 1: I think there are no rules to deepen in Unconditional Love. It is already an unconditioned, unconditional energy. So to say that you love like this, you love like this, you deepen like this is only logical from a limited point of view. So I don’t think it’s possible to confine Unconditional Love to a rule, but on the other hand, you can learn Unconditional Love with rules. We cannot exclude anything when we talk about Unconditional Love as it is an energy that comes from beyond everything and it is an energy that permeates everything and becomes one with it… It teaches itself, that’s what I’m writing to point out.

Add-on 2: Focusing on the inner center called the Spiritual Heart is a technique used to feel Divine Love intensely and deeply. For this we focus on the center of our chest, and we deeply want (intend) to find God, truth, reality, to experience this Divine Love, and every time our focus wanders, every time our attention is drawn to thoughts, emotions, the physical world, we bring it back to the center of our chest. The awareness of the Spiritual Heart and Divine Love increases as one continues to focus in the way described in this paragraph. We are actually focusing on God. The uncreated dimension of God that is beyond all creation. (A little update: We could expand the word beyond to ‘encompassing all of creation, and independent of time, space, existence, knowledge, dimension, meaning, whatever’, but God is impossible to put into words, isn’t it?) If we do this while sitting with full focus, it is seated Spiritual Heart Meditation. If we do it while living our life, keeping part of our awareness in the Spiritual Heart and part of it in our worldly affairs as needed, this can be expressed as Spiritual Heart or heart-centered living. We are living in a meditative state. I hope to write more about meditation one day.

About the translation: This writing has been translated into English from Turkish with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version/2022). It uses AI and deep learning algorithms to provide translations with very close ratings to human translators. It was the most accurate computer translator as of 2022 and I am using it to be able to make available all my writings in Turkish or English in both languages, making minor edits to the translations when I have the time if I notice any need of improvement and also to make it possible to provide translations of as much as possible of my site’s content in other languages in the future. 

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